Why me?

I have been trying to start discussions about some of the nasty rhetorics I have been subjected to lately here at Gaia, without talking about me, without making it personal, because I simply assume that people are not singling me out, that the world is not after getting me, specifically, that others have been treated with the same, unfair, devious, insinuating, insincere and passive aggressive bullying tactics, and I have been sharing some information that has helped me a lot in dealing with that.

The response I have received is... well, to put it simply bad. There has been only two guys that have given me thumbs up, the rest has been...
I mean, I have tried to understand this integral synchronisity new world stuff, and one thing everyone is SAYING is that the intentions are all that matters, that I will receive what I put in the world, and then they are treating me like shit when I try to help?

Someone said I was calling people names, being cruel and poisoning the world with my words, and a respected member of the community told her she put her finger exactly on the problem here... So I am the problem here. This person claims to love me! She says I'm a hypocritical, namecalling troll, but she so loves me. Frak her and her love! May Goddess protect me from love like that. But sure, she is all innocent, and doesn't mean anything and hasn't done anything wrong and doesn't understand how I can be so hateful when all she does is love me, and the whole fraking community believes her, and joins the battle against dragon me.

I have spent a lot of time trying to be a princess, because they always got what I wanted, but the truth is that I am a dragon. And I like being a dragon. Dragons are amazing. Strong, beautiful... but it's not easy to be a dragon in humans' world. I'm always wrong, always ugly, always intimidating, dangerous, need to be put in my place... Jantelaw all over, again, even in here, where I thought I could find a refuge, because people were being talking so highly of important things like respect, love, tolerance, peace and harmony... but they don't mean what I mean with these words.
Respect is something people expect to get, not something they expect to give.
Tolerance is a swearword including intolerance.
Diversity is something bad because everyone should be like angels singing OM and trying to be better, according to what they think is better.
Love... love is a duty, something people are suppose to feel to everyone, and it has nothing to do with that warm, fuzzy feeling inside, that makes you glad to see the other one, that makes you happy of having the person in your life, that makes you feel good and like yourself, when you are with him...
All these words that don't mean what I thought they mean.

You know what? Frak you. How the heck would anyone believe in the new world order you are trying to sell, when it is painfully obvious that you don't believe in it yourself? Of course it's "so nice" to be bashing everyone around you with the principles, but when the principles are such as "law of karma" and "you sow what you reap", "what you send out comes to you", why are you not getting the crap you dish out to me and certainly to the rest of the world, as I'm not anything special.

It's like... I must have been a really horrible person in my previous life. :´D

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To quote a friend of mine:

Apparently you are like catnip to cats with people. […] they STILL chose combat with you.

I know it's not any consolation, Ket, but try and see it as a compliment - they are so intimidated by you that they have to try and put you down.

They are also projecting heavily. If they can make it about you, they won't have to adjust anything or, G-d forbid, admit that they might be wrong.

They speak high and low about being here to learn, but they don't think they have anything to learn.

Yes, it's painful, very painful, it's spirit crushing, and all I have to offer you is a hug and the sentiment that I think Dragons are beautiful and very wise Creatures, I hope it helps a little

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lol
soooooooo glad i haven't bothered to look up this latest drama
the comment on the who's better than another one, shows how full of love and growth people are that they feel so insecure that they have to jockey to be so involved and 'show' how great they are…if no one sees me type love, then who will glorify me in a bliss ninny way and support my high? (yes that was a slam)

The other end of that is, why care, it's the internet. Why do some push so hard to be accepted in a space where others are signaling they are not welcomed? I suppose each person is ok doing what they like in their own living rooms. Online, people can exhibit that living room scenario, but with free and open internet space(rather making ASSes…oh *cough assumptions, that everyone knows it and HOW dare they behave otherwise…defend my turf dammit! pees in corners).

In a general way with the extremes of self expression going all the way to bully by physical force, each person that has had to fight to express themselves and rid themselves of what they might have felt as oppression–no matter the reality of it, will fight with teeth bared and claws out. And then type, respectfully with love.

My family loved me enough to burn my hand on a griddle. They told me they loved me and needed me to know why they said no to touching it and then put my hand on it flat and held it there. Love is a word. Energy is energy, it cannot lie. Doesn't matter how many books one reads, seminars one attends, teachers, gurus and rolex watch collectors one worships, we are still who we are on the inside of the wrapping paper.

- Elisa

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If it is a dragon that you fashion yourself of, my friend, then by all means be the very MOST of this dragon that you can be, with all of your heart, your might, your all. By doing so, you are the reflection of that which you worship as your Goddess. I would like to offer my portion of healing to you in this post here, sending it your way as I write this to you specifically. May the wounds be already healed as you receive this. So be it, my friend.

much love
rich

Stop junk mail!

Here's how to do it:
http://tinyurl.com/y9bz8ao

For USonians. The rest of the world has to adjust the advice to themselves. There are ways to do this, where ever you live, and "wasting" one day to find out how, calling companies and writing to people is worth it. The Western society uses tons of paper to print this crap, and nature to print, distribute and waste this crap.

http://www.obviously.com/junkmail/

Now, if you think it might be good to get the ads and what-nots home, here's
50 things to do with junk mail


:-D

Mayan Calendar and other things.

I apologize to all who has left comments - I don't get them home, I don't know when anyone comments, so I haven't been responding to comments. I'm sorry for that, but I think I know now where the problem lies and can correct it :-)

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I am reading another of these "must read spriritual books" - this one Carl Johan Calleman's Mayan Calendar, and there's a lot of thoughts in my head.

He says that it is a pity that we "ignore" "half the world's" knowledge when we create our world view. "Half of the world" being Meso-America and specifically the Mayans. Rest of the world being the "Western world", that is Western Europe and even more specifically the Greco-Roman world view, with some flavoring from the Jews, Egyptians and Babylonians, and spread by the Anglosaxons, French and Latinos.

World according to Calleman - in red "Western World", in blue "Eastern World"

I suppose there's somewhere a slight acknowledgement of the other Native American peoples, but their wisdom, knowledge, science and culture is seen as "basically the same" as the Mayan, besides, they didn't write anything down, so one doesn't need to care about them.

I believe it is stupid to go around the world to seek for information.
We have the diamond field in our home garden. The treasure is buried under the tree under which we slept when babies.
It's not in India, unless I'm Indian, it's not in Mayan calendar unless I'm Mayan, it's not with the Native Americans, unless I am Native American, it's not in the Tanakh, unless I'm Jewish...
The Mayans came to the knowledge they had by observing the world and thinking, and that is possible for everyone.
If you want to know the secrets of the stars, sit on a mountain top every night from sundown to sunrise and see.
If you want to know the secrets of time, observe it and see.
If you want to know the secrets of life, live.

If you want to know the secrets of God, listen to Her. She is always there, teaching, everything around you is God's Word.
The leaf that blows from the tree over your path is a message from God.
The advertisement you notice in the ocean surrounding us, is a message from God.
Your dreams are messages from God.

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Some people seem to find it offensive that the scientists try to find the birth place of humankind. Following the markers in our genome, this place is in Africa. From Africa, the people spread all over the planet. Every today living human being has an African ancestry.
We spread over the planet and created us a life according to the special requirements of each living place. The aborigins of Australia did it their way, the Mayans did it their way, the Samic people of Northern Europe did it their way. Everyone looked around them and created a wonderful mythology explaining why things are the way they are, and everyone has their own culture based on the results of their research. Every people on this planet has a rich and wonderful spiritual knowledge that could be useful to anyone. I just happen to believe that we all are born where ever we are born for a reason, and one part of that reason is to go to our own culture and learn that way.

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The Mayan had knowledge of zero. They had probably inherited that from Olmecs. There is no signs of any other use of zero anywhere else in the American continents.
In Asia they had knowledge of zero long before the current reckoning as well, but they spread their knowledge.
We know that the Indians taught zero to Muslims, who brought it to Europe.
We know that the Greek were very uncomfortable about the concepts of "nothing" and "void" and therefore also zero. They thought that there cannot be nothingness and eternity at the same time.

I am very fond of nothingness. The most important wisdom in the world is "I am full of crap and know nothing".

Reducing

When one is in pain, the streamlining becomes "natural".
Today's advice is about doing only the 5 most important things.

I don't shower every day. It's not necessary. I don't need to leave my home, and I'm not that dirty. Besides, I save water.
Are you aware that we in Western "civilized" countries use PURE DRINKING WATER to that? What is even more horrifying is that we use PURE DRINKING WATER - the most precious resource on this planet - to flush down our feces...
Read a bit about water.

I have reduced my internet groups a lot. I still have difficulties leaving all of them, but - What are they good for? Why am I a member of this group?
and
What else could I be doing with the time I spent on-line?
are two very important questions.

I spent a lot of time in the internet, because I'm usually too tired to be doing something sensible with my time. How about you?

I mean, all these people who say that their life's goal is to eradicate themselves (or their "ego") and dedicate themselves to "pure love" towards their fellow humans - what the heck are they doing HERE? They are not asking people to join their activities, they are not looking for things to do, no, we are all TALKING here. I talk, you talk, everyone TALKS. It's just WORDS, WORDS, WORDS, all day long, in dozens of groups... and mostly what people talk about is how *I* see the world. That *I* think people should eradicate their egos, that *I* think you are wrong, that *I* have this opinion and that belief, and so on.

99% of people you meet on the internet doesn't want to meet you in "real life". That's why they are on-line, and not out there, meeting people.

So, what are the 5 things that are most important to you. Do them today. You might be dead tomorrow, so why spent time on irrelevant or secondary things?
And the same tomorrow. You don't need to do more than 5 things every day.

If you think your family is important, spend today with your family. Not with strangers on-line, or watching soap operas or "documentaries" of some people's lives in the television.
If you think money is important, spend the day by earning money. Now, if your blog is your money-maker, work a couple of hours with your blog, and a couple of hours by advertising your blog in different forums on-line.
If you think your pet is important, spend the day with your pet. Teach it some new tricks. Take your dog to a long walk. That's good for you too.
If you think art is important, spend the day by going to an exhibition, a gallery, a library to watch art books, and make art the rest of the day.
If you think loving your fellow human beings is important, go and do that, in different ways you can imagine. Go and "click for free". Sign petitions. Go out and work a couple of hours in a soup kitchen. Talk with homeless people. The mere fact that you SEE them, that another human being SEES you and treats you like you were an equal makes your day :-) Go and read a fairytale in a library, bookstore or park. Go see some old people.

But, on to next issue.
Here's 8 easy steps to less material clutter in your life.
The first step reminded me of today's "meditation for people who do too much", which was the one above.
How to declutter our spiritual life, mental life, social life, economical life, intellectual life?
You do it the same way. You take things that are important and enjoyable, and scrap everything else.
If people irritate you in an online community, don't go there.

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Oh Goddess how tired I am.

In my life, what I do is not only a question of what is important, but what I can do. I cannot do what I think is important. I have no energy to take the dog out for a long walk, or clean my home. My hands hurt and that makes it difficult to do arts and crafts. I have no energy to take the buss to the library, or to my sisters. Mere talking is exhausting, so I don't call my sisters either.
My life is hopefully different from yours. You have the energy. You don't take medication that drains you from energy, you don't have a chronic pain condition. So why are you wasting your life?

Today's action for the healthier planet - and you:

read this article about the surprising things you can find oil - petroleum
There's oil in chewing gum, candles, tape, sheer pantyhose...

While you are at it, click for free to donate for several different causes, I think it's easiest either in Care2 or breast cancer site. You could put either site as the starting window when you open the computer, and click before you read your post. It doesn't take more than a minute to click for all the causes in Care2 and breast cancer site.

recommendation - thich nhat hanh - 1965

Promise me,
promise me this day,
promise me now,
while the sun is overhead
exactly at the zenith,
promise me:

Even as they
strike you down
with a mountain of hatred and violence;
even as they step on you and crush you
like a worm,
even as they dismember and disembowel you,
remember, brother,
remember:
man is not our enemy.

The only thing worthy of you is compassion –
invincible, limitless, unconditional.
Hatred will never let you face
the beast in man.

One day, when you face this beast alone,
with your courage intact, your eyes kind,
untroubled
(even as no one sees them),
out of your smile
will bloom a flower.
And those who love you
will behold you
across ten thousand worlds of birth and dying.

Alone again,
I will go on with bent head,
knowing that love has become eternal.
On the long, rough road,
the sun and the moon
will continue to shine.

Know Thyself

Know Thyself
- Socrates

To Thine Own Self Be True
- Shakespeare

"Know Thyself" was written over the portal of the antique world. Over the portal
of the new world, "Be Thyself" shall be written.
- Oscar Wilde


"When the day comes that I must account for my life, I will not be asked: `Why
weren't you Moses?' I was not equipped to be Moses.
But I dread the question, `Why weren't you Zusia?'
—Reb Zusia of Anipoli

The very purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we hold of
ourselves with the appalling things that other people think about us.
- Quentin Crisp

I started writing a book "13 moons and one day", about how to be a witch. The
first chapter is all about me, myself and I.

You have been created to be you, a perfect you, just the way you are. You are
not to be like someone else, like anyone else.

Your dreams are your own, your hopes, your ambitions, all your own. No-one else
shares those exact same dreams, hopes and ambitions with you. These dreams are
given to you, to fit you as a glove, for you to reach out for, for you to make
real, because you are the only person in the world who can do that.
A lot of people waste their time by trying to be someone else, trying to reach
someone else's goals, trying to look like someone else.

I don't think "The Secret" is worth much in that it is very heavily
concentrating on secundary things, like money, house, things to own and so on.
What is good about it is that it makes you think about what YOU want. What YOU
want is unique and personal. What YOU want is what YOU are created to get. The
Universe, Goddess, WANTS you to get what you want, because She put in that want
in you. Your whole life experience, with the good and the bad things, have been
given to you only so that you would want what you do want.

In many religions wanting is seen as something bad, unwanted, but even those
people want. They might want enlightenment and Nirvana, they might want Kingdom
Come, they might want a deeper experience of God, but those too are wants,
unique and own to these people.

There is nothing bad in wanting itself. The bad comes in when you start
believing you want something that you don't really want. Most people do quite
fine without being millionaires. Most people want the money to be able to pay
for their food, electricity, home, transport... perhaps some entertainment,
clothes, things... Think about what you want the money for. There are many ways
of getting what you want without money.
Might be that you have an aunt you didn't know you have, who dies and leaves you
her house.
One of my favorite children's books was a story about two girls, best friends,
who were given a house of their own. This eccentric millionaire loved to build
houses, but she always built them "unfit" for her - this specific house was
build for two little girls :-D The house was already fully decorated and there
were even pretty clothes in the closet for the girls.
Now, we think that will never happen in "real life", and it is quite possible
that that won't happen, but it is also possible that it might happen. Miracles
do happen. So concentrate on wanting the house in stead.
Perhaps you don't really want a house. Perhaps you want an apartment in stead.
Perhaps you want a houseboat. Or gypsy wagon. Or something else. You want to
live in the forest in a tent the rest of your life. Or in a treehouse, like
Tolkien's elves.

How little do we know that which we are! How less what we may be!
- Lord Byron

Study the heart and the mind of man, and begin with your own. Meditation and
reflection must lay the foundation of that knowledge, but experience and
practice must, and alone can, complete it.
- Lord Chesterfield

Observe all men; thy self most.
- Benjamin Franklin