I have been playing. Absentmindedly I doodled on Ostara and "invented" two interesting countdown calendars. Now I just need to make them. :-D
I am planning on having a dinner party. Like Christmas, except on Easter. And, yes, it will be on Christian Easter, 10 days after the Pagan one.
I saw these cute little decorated matchstick boxes. I love the rich effect of piling the stuff on it :-D That would be a nice favor. Now... what to put inside... Hmm... My sisters are easy, but guys...What do you give to guys that is that small?
I suppose I could take the easy way out and give them a scratch lottery ticket. *sigh* It's really impersonal.
But... a memory card for PC, camera...? Maybe a movie on it? Good idea, but too expensive.
So - off to planning the party and some other things :-)
P.S. I'm starting to think about brunch instead... Easter brunch... yes, it sounds better.
P.P.S. I'm worried about the entertainment... Half of my guests would not be entertained by things like easter egg hunt, which I would think wonderful. Most of the guests will not sing either. *sigh*
This is what she's talking about:
"Dear Know-It-All-People-Without-Kids, Shut the Fuck Up"
(Of course she didn't have the guts to say "fuck", she said "percent-dollar-number-at", but I'm also 100% sure of that she doesn't say "percent-dollar-number-at" when she swears.)
This is what I have to say about that.
Dear "mommyfriend",
people who start defining themselves through other people are suffering from a mental disorder called codependency. You need to grow up and start taking responsibility of your own life, and stop manipulating people. You are not primarily a mother and a wife - stay-at-home-mother and house-wife at that - you are primarily you. Your children are not your children. They are individual human beings who just happened to enter the world through you and their father. Having this honor bestowed upon you by God doesn't make you "parenting guru" or competent to give advice on marriage. I'd listen to any childless pediatrician about children's health rather than any mother. I'd listen to an unmarried marriage counselor rather than some woman whose credentials in the subject is "I've been married to 10 years".
And as Lindsay says, some unmarried and childless people give better advice than most married people with children. Because it is as you say, all the children are different. All the people are different and all the marriages are different. But all the children and marriages also have similarities.
I can tell you that you cannot say how parents feel when childless people give parenting advice. You can only talk about how you feel. And as you say "this slideshow is about nine years in making", you started collecting aversions already when your experience about parenting was none what so ever. You pushed the baby through your vulva, so you're an expert in child rearing... >:-> Just the same way as you married and suddenly was a marriage expert. It's rude to offer advice unless asked, you say, but that doesn't stop you from writing your advice on several sites on the internet, even though the majority of the internet readers haven't asked for it. It's also rude to call people names. " a smug such as yourself". But I suppose you are just rude. It doesn't help to sugarcover it with "please" and "all due respect", especially when we both know you don't think "smugs such as childless people" due any respect at all.
I'm glad you don't have daughters. I feel sorry for your future daughters-in-law. Women are not born with knowledge on how to take care of children, and we don't get it magically the day we find out we are pregnant, or any day after that, not on the day we give birth to our child, nor later. We learn the knowledge, skill, art of rearing children, and the ability to learn is not connected to our genitals. There are thousands of childless nannies, who are better at the job than any mother. The simple fact that they are not emotionally bonded to the child already gives them an edge. I mean, it's YOUR CHILD. You are bound to make irrational decisions based on your emotions. Nothing wrong with that, it just makes you less capable of deeming the situation correctly, and it makes every childless person better at it.
It's interesting that you call your husband "big daddy" and your son "boy wonder" (and his little brother is boo-boo? Hm.) and you - "mommyfriend". I bet you don't even notice how important it is in your family to keep up the appearance that a male is "big" and "superhero", and a female is "friendly". Big momma, as we all know, refers to her body size, and is not something people would like to hear of themselves. But I suppose, you can't easily call yourself a wonder woman, because... you don't really do anything. You married and got kids, and that's it. Now, of course you are "a secretary, a housekeeper, a gardener, an organizer, an accountant, etc." but not really. Let's fool anyone here. Most SAHMs are not good enough to actually get paid by strangers for any of that stuff, and that's kind of the requirement to be able to use that occupational title of oneself. It's not that I'm putting down the "career" of SAHMs, but - let's be honest. You are just a mother and a wife.
"I don't expect
you to understand why consistency is a nice idea in theory. I'm a parent
who has been beaten into submission by my children and I'm a better,
more practical, more clever and more awesome mother and person for it." No, you're not. You are an idiot who thinks children are somehow different from every other human being, and your children are especially special. Raising children is very much like training dogs, cats or any other animal. Every animal trainer could tell you that consistency is not "a nice idea in theory". So could every professional nanny and teacher. You are just trying to justify your failure in being consistent and having enough self-confidence to actually be a parent, and not just some emotional beating bag. You are not better, more practical, more clever nor more awesome mother or person for it. You have just given up trying to follow the ideas you had before you got kids, because you don't really understand how that is done, and you lack patience and understanding of how you yourself function to be able to be consistent and give your children a parent they could trust. Luckily children are intelligent and resilient beings who will survive any emotional abuse you throw at them. You are doing just as well as most other mothers, and luckily for you, you won't need to deal with your children's problems. It will be their teachers, their spouses, their therapists, their co-workers and everyone else, but you. And you don't know anything about how tired other people are and why. I have fibromyalgia and sleep apnea. It means that I am tired almost all the time, because I'm in great pain 90% of the time, and I can't sleep much. You wanted your kids. If you want to sleep, send them to have a sleep-over at their friends or grand-parents, or have a weekend off and sleep the whole weekend in a hotel somewhere - or at your friend's or parents', and stop whining. You're not even a single mother!
So, I'd love to tell you how well you are doing as a mother and how great your kids are, but I would be lying, now, wouldn't I, and that's not ok. And I might have the inclination of offering a word of support or encouragement, but you haven't asked for it, and it's rude to talk to strangers, and stupid to even bother about people who yelled at you at your first meeting, and called you names and wished you "difficult children" (Frankly, to me that's a blessing, I'd take ANY children, and frankly, I'd be happy to have "difficult" children, just to be able to show you and other idiots how it's done. I'd be able to show how it's done with your children. Give them to me for a week, and you'll apologize, and come to smugs like me for advice in the future. You see, you don't know what other people have in their heads, and perhaps they actually do have a point, and sound advice, and something helpful to say, which you will miss, because you are so fucking full of yourself, "better, more practical, more clever and more awesome mother and person". And I'm glad for that. Serves you right. The problem here is that it's we who need to tolerate your children when they act out in public, and as they do, you obviously are doing something wrong. Kids don't "act out" without a reason, you know. Adults don't "act out" without a reason either. And when it comes to children, YOU are most likely the reason they "act out" in public. YOU did something wrong, or didn't do something right at home. YOU should know if your children are too tired or hungry or sick or upset or bothered by something to go shopping or in a restaurant. YOU should have taken care of that problem already at home. So, yes, if your children "act out" in public, it IS YOUR FAULT, and I have the right to tell you and ask you to remedy the problem without you having the right to start bitching about it.
SO, yes, YOU are the reason why childless people offer you parenting advice, and YOU are the reason why childless people hate mothers. Work with your self-esteem and grow up and have a life. Stop hiding behind "I'm a mother and wife, I have done my duty to the society" shield.
I especially love these comments:
"Don’t worry. I have no interest in telling you how to raise your
children. Life will do that eventually. Just teach your children not to
touch things that are not theirs (including produce at the grocery store
or other people’s dogs – my God, some parents have no sense!), take
them out of the restaurant when they have a screaming tantrum, do not
drag them to R-rated films or to child-unfriendly businesses, especially
past their bedtime, and don’t cajole them to bother me in public when I
am minding my own business (this is called “babystalking”) – and you
and I should be cool."
"Awww I don’t believe that many childfree people are bothering you with
unsolicited advice. Childfree people usually try to stay far from
children and their accompanying, simpleton mommies. That’s my thing
with mothers, not so much the fathers, is that you constantly think that
someone gives a shit about your common kid. You do, I presume the
grandparents do. But as for the rest of us, forget it."
" Of course the childless have something that none of you have;
The very good sense not to breed in a world overflowing with humans. Most of us don’t care about your kid, or your self-imposed
“problems”. You had it, so you raise it. The only advice we want to
give you is “get your tubes tied!” Just don’t block the supermarket isles, sidewalks or doorways while
you are doing so, or nearly cause car accidents messing with your spawn,
or let your brat(s) scream, fuss, and/or run wild wherever they are, or
expect us to cheerfully foot the bill for your tax credits and
ever-rising school costs."
And what about that? What about YOU seeing what we do RIGHT in stead of what we do wrong? What about thanking us for paying for your child's healthcare and education? (I don't know how much of this is applicable in where ever you live, but here in Sweden we even pay for your public transportation, and the buss is ALWAYS full of selfish idiots blocking the way with their buggies and whining about how horrible all the other travelers and busdriver is for not giving them more space and help and benefits and shit. Oh, I hate those people.
And even though I don't have children of my own, I have answered for others' children, both as a nanny and as a preschool teacher, and I have never needed to deal with a kid "acting out". I have never had any reason to punish any of them, because it really is enough to see that they don't need to be hungry, tired or angry, that they are seen and heard, listened to and treated like the intelligent persons they are. When explained beforehand what is expected of them, why and how they will be able to deliver, and explained later if something went wrong, why it went wrong and how they can deal with that, they will behave well. And, yes, being consequent is elementary.
At the present time your behavior is characterized by your need for prosperity. Having enough
money means security for you, but also the freedom to be able to afford something that brings you
joy and to be better able to live in accordance with your own ideas. Your attitude towards money
is ambivalent: you generally think very economically and you save money where you can in order to
hold onto it. At times, however, you unexpectedly spend a great deal because you also want to get
something out of it.
Interpretation of the Colors You Find Most Pleasing
Of great importance to you now is...
...crisis-proof existential survival.
You need the comforting certainty of having a solid base in your life. Stable
living conditions, adequate income and sensual pleasure and a certain measure of comfort are
among your life goals. You want to be secure against the whims of fate and to be able to devote
yourself without distraction to the things that give you satisfaction. For this reason you
resolutely apply yourself to the task of creating a crisis-proof existence, despite any obstacles
which might appear. The thing you consider very important for your sense of wellbeing is...
...alert self-protection.
You carefully scrutinize everything that crosses your path and you don’t say yes to
it until it has passed your acid test. You decidedly and resolutely fend off everything that
could hinder your personal development and you keep your distance from unpleasant people who try
to manipulate, define or influence you. The thing you have consciously planned is...
...vigorous effort.
You need a task that inspires you and allows you to give your all. If serious
demands are made on your abilities or your strengths you mobilize all your creativity and really
stay on the ball in order to prove to yourself and others what you are capable of. If your
efforts are acknowledged you are prepared to do your best. Should someone approach you with
unfair demands or even worse with outright injustice, however, you resolutely fend them off. At
present you are working particularly hard for...
...objective assessment of the situation.
Whatever you perceive –people, things or information – you analyze it, both
critically and with a certain amount of skepticism, because you want to be certain whether it is
beneficial to you or not. You are not easily misled and in line with the motto “once bitten,
twice shy” you keep your distance from everything that could do to damage your wallet, your
reputation, your wellbeing or your peace of mind. One thing is utterly clear to you: Your present
situation requires...
...optimistic self-encouragement.
Again and again you consciously adopt a positive inner attitude. This helps you to
better stand up under the hardships of the present. You create goals, projects or ideals for
yourself that give you a boost and the hope that your life will be better and happier. You search
for ways and means which allow you to enjoy life without care and to spend more time devoting
yourself to the things that bring you joy. In order to forge ahead in good spirits you now
need...
...nurturing useful relationships.
Due to the fact that you are stuck in a genuinely unpleasant situation you seek
contact with helpful people you hope will show you understanding and provide you with moral
support. It could be that you receive the necessary encouragement but in the end you have to
solve your personal problems yourself. Your common sense will help you in this.
You can ask yourself:
Doesn’t my determination not to allow others to influence me stem from an inner sense of insecurity that I don’t want to see and absolutely don’t want to admit? Has my stubborn, egocentric behavior ever won me anyone’s sympathy? Does my striving to cope despite difficulties not carry a risk of my concentrating too strongly on what I have planned, thus limiting my field of vision for other possibilities?
Interpretation of the Colors You Find Most Unpleasant
At the moment you feel most anxious due to your...
...inhibiting limitations.
Difficult circumstances limit your opportunities for experience and your freedom of
action. You feel deprived because you have to do without some of the things that would make life
pleasant. You expect far too much understanding for your needs from other people and as a result
you often feel disappointed. You might ask yourself how much understanding and empathy you show
for others. You would like to be free of your...
...aggressive irritability.
You often feel hindered by someone, either because your lovely plans get crossed or
because someone puts bothersome obstacles in your path, criticizes you, offends you or otherwise
annoys you. For this reason you have accumulated a great deal of resentment inside which can
discharge in the form of unexpected aggressive reactions. As long as you have not yet forgiven
someone who has angered or injured you, you will not get rid of your explosive irritability. You
are happy to give someone close to you the blame for your...
...dangerous tendency towards depression.
Sad events or a hard stroke of fate have triggered dispiriting feelings in you such
as depressiveness, pessimism, fear or insecurity. You turn to pleasurable things to try to
distract yourself from this experience and to forget it. However, the repressed emotions could
make themselves known in the form of unwelcome physical complaints. You could also end up in a
depressive mood due to your...
...unpleasant contentiousness.
The behavior of certain other people is a thorn in your side. You don’t feel like
putting up with just anything without objection, and because of this you can give no guarantee
you won’t end up in an argument with the person in question. Your stubborn attitude could easily
provoke confrontations. At the moment your mood is somewhat gloomy due to your...
...frightening lack of power.
You constantly see yourself confronted with a mountain of difficulties and
problems. At the same time you don’t want to let yourself be dragged down by feelings of despair
and resignation. For this reason you concentrate on achieving what is most important to you right
now. The resources you employ in doing so range from winning affability to skillful manipulation
all the way to authoritarian pressure because you want to get everything under control. Your fear
of being powerless arouses exactly the opposite in you: a thirst for power. You also feel
powerless in the face of your...
...fear of rejection.
You often feel isolated from other people by an invisible wall and sometimes you
get the creeping feeling that even the people you like don’t really love you and possibly even
reject you. On the other hand you enjoy standing out from the crowd with your willfulness,
unusual views and egocentric behavior. Your “distinctiveness trip“ does win you attention, but
not the warm-hearted affection you require.
Your unconscious advices you:
When you are plagued by feelings of want or anger, don’t seek your
consolation in faith in a better future. Instead of investing in something uncertain, take a
sober look at the unpleasant facts without blaming anyone for them. Then consider how you could
improve your situation, and do it now! Life is always happening NOW.
When something bothers, unsettles or frightens you, don’t try desperately to
play calm and to act as if you weren’t bothered by it. You can't get rid of negative feelings
that way, but if you get into the habit of observing them without passing judgment you will be
able to see that if you don’t give in to them they dissipate like smoke.
I have been playing with scrapbooking today.
I can't get it to work. Hrmph.
On brown paper strips of scrapbooking paper or wrapping paper or what ever paper you want with right colors. You could paint your own paper... I happen to like those sort of vintage-y prints, that are really difficult to copy oneself. :-D
On the first, the photo (grey area) is clued on a tag that has been cut (or papered with) scrapbooking paper, on the second the journal area is on the tag. First one has ribbon, second string... I like the string, but it's not working... I perhaps need to use more of it. A lot more. All over the place.
On the second the scrapbooking paper has been torn to add some interest - doesn't give enough interest. I suppose I need to rip the lower piece of paper too. Or the white (whitish) paper...
Then there's some wrinkled red tissue paper added.
I suppose the proportions are all wrong. The picture needs to be bigger... like 150 % bigger.
And I want more buttons. Different buttons.
And maybe the "Merry Yule! stamp on the other one too, to cut a bit of the red sea.
I also wonder if they understand what "tribune" means.
I hate this.
Goddess is not a woman. Goddess is Goddess.
What's wrong with being a woman? Calling women "goddesses" is diminishing both the Goddess and the woman. It's saying the divine Goddess doesn't exist, because every woman is a goddess. It's saying being a woman is not enough. Why would anyone want to be called a goddess and get the expectation of being perfect, superhuman and somehow better than all the other women on this planet.
I am no goddess. I am a woman. I am a woman, JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER WOMAN ON THIS PLANET. Not better, not worse, created by the True Goddess, the One and Only, beloved by the True Goddess, the One and Only.
I don't have unlimited capacity to make my life anything I want it to be.
My capacity is limited by me being a human being, it's limited by me needing to share it with other human beings who have their own ideas and preferences. I can choose the people I want to share my life with, but every person in my life more than me, comes with limitations. I cannot, I shouldn't try to control my environment and the people in my life.
Right now I'm thinking about my fibromyalgia, which makes it practically impossible for me to do certain things I'd like to do.
I'm thinking about the fact that I am childless, even when I don't want to be. I trust Goddess to know best what is best for me, and I hope one day I will have wisdom enough to truly accept Her decision.
I'm thinking about the fact that I fell in love with a man who doesn't want me - because he already has a woman... and I ALREADY HAVE A MAN - whom I adore! I mean... I would be causing a lot of harm to FOUR PEOPLE if I went by what *I* WANT. I want him. I want him so bad it hurts. I want my life to be with him, I want... No. NO! My life is with my husband, who is absolutely perfect for me. My Goddess given husband.
No. This is offensive, not empowering. It's enslaving by praise and flattery. It's putting impossible, unfair and unreasonable expectations on people.
And the thing is that even though I love Selina Fenech, because they use this image to illustrate this stupidity, I find all kinds of faults in this image. My biggest problem is "why the heck do they always have to be so f-ing skinny!"
Perfection, perfection, perfection... nothing else is good enough... and no woman is ever perfect, which makes us never good enough.
I have read God Delusion. It's a really stupid book. I can hear Richard Dawkins bursting by the joy of his own "wittiness", and all I do is to shake my head and feel sorry for him. He hasn't really understood why people believe in God at all, so all his arguments are flawed before he even expresses them. He's mostly arguing against an imaginary enemy, who is really very stupid. I know, I know, there are people like that, but it's rather irritating to be a theist and excitedly read a book that is said to make you question your beliefs, so sharp, so smart, so intelligent, so to the point - by other Atheists - and then read this... pitifully stupid scripture... tut, tut, tut.
No, I don't understand why the book is so appreciated. I suppose none of the people who praise it, understand the mind of a theist.
Today I read a typical rant of an islamophob. "they say all these things, but are lying bla bla bla." Really stupid, that too. And it was posted in a Facebook group called "The Richard Dawkins Foundation for Reason and Science (Official)" [I love that (official) :-D] "Oh, "The Richard Dawkins Foundation for Reason and Science (Official)"... I wonder how it is?" Oh, my... Exactly as I expected it to be, I'm sad to say. People worshiping their guru, who's basking in the limelight and people expressing their fundamentalist Atheist opinions more or less eloquently.
Here's one post:
Be proud your an athiest it means you understand that people who have faith in something like a god also have to asked who created him and who created the one who creatwd god and the list goes on and on into a number you cannot imagine which means such people are so deluded and fooled by mystical claims they have nothing to offer mankinds progress in mind science. indeed they are a danger to slow down progress if they get to the future generations of childrens minds which they are attempting now. The mind can be got at by certain practises certain ways so the quest of all athiests is to point out to all got at individuals who are ignorant the facts of past present and every increasing observations and experiments that give answers to the mysterys of life, Also to support efforts to rid our governments of religions and not involve them in politics thats all we can do the rest will come in time and we will have a world maybe not in our time but in the future that is free from religion and its wars and continuing progression and dam right right exciting however we can at least watch our numbers grow and grow. No change is impossable in the democratic countrys with the right numbers supporting it so I guess certain things must not be allowed in schools only facts and relivent infoirmation to a childs growing mind. Its a big ask but time has a way of changing nonesense into education born of common sense and reasoning, If this is to happen we need athiests in government in schools and in the community and proud and sure of themselves and what they pass on so are you a proud athiest ?
Now, the person writing this is aware of that his spelling and writing is not very good, and that's ok. People should be able to express themselves even when they do it like this. One can have little education, or be operating under brain fog, or for any other reason, but it is very irritating. And easy to start mocking him for his spelling errors...
You are making the mistake of believing that one's spiritual beliefs are in any way connected to one's scientific beliefs, and thus making the same mistake as all the fundamentalists, like fundamentalist Christians. To you "theist=bad", to them "atheist=bad". You are both equally wrong, both equally narrow-minded, both equally stupid, ignorant, prejudiced and fundamentalist.
I don't think any person who could be of any use to science can be brainwashed in such a manner, even when objected to that as a child. And it doesn't matter if the person is brainwashed by theist fundies or atheist fundies. Stupid, narrow-minded, ignorant, prejudiced fundamentalists seldom have ANYTHING worthy to add to anything. What have you added to world? Or what has Richard Dawkins added to the world? Memes and "God Delusion"? Neither his own idea.
The fundamentalist atheism IS a religion. Any fundamentalist ideology is a religion. Most wars have nothing to do with God.
"...so I guess certain things must not be allowed in schools only facts and relivent infoirmation"
Yeah... let's remove such nasty things like art and crafts, sports, domestic "science" and other such things that are not "facts and relivent infoirmation". Why bother teaching children to read and write, they'd only be reading fiction and that's bad! And teaching them literature, especially the ancient literature... myths and legends... dang, that's the source of everything bad in the world! Or teaching them about religions! No! We cannot tell the sensitive kids that there are people in the world who BELIEVE IN GOD(s)!!! They might get ideas!
Oh, dear. I'm glad I'm not a "proud athiest", but a foolish theist and an artist. I suppose it's good I don't have children, because I'd teach them such horrible things as watching the nature and seeing beauty and not numbers and facts. I'd teach them to cook without telling them about the optimal temperature for proteins to coagulate, and I'd teach them that there's more in the world than what can be measured...
Then there was this:
I love philosoraptor. She's witty and funny with his innocent inquiries, that aren't really innocent at all. But this is just stupid. It's assuming the atheists make the most convincing arguments. They don't. Especially not if they are anything like those Richard Dawkins uses.
It's also assuming this is a novel idea. The fundamental Christians these fundamental Atheists fight with, already have an answer to that. "God didn't make Atheists, Atheists are people who believe Satan's lies and deception. Atheists are brainwashed, poor creatures. They don't know how wrong they are, but one day, God willing, they will see the light and realize how deceived they were, and fall on their knees and thank God for being saved and beg for forgiveness for all the Satanic lies and filth they were spreading when "under influence"... "
So - this is just stupid, and offensive, because I want my philosoraptor to be witty, and this is below her intelligence.
""so the muslim riots that are going on have been caused because of a film that portrays mohammud as a barbaric pedophille. last time i read the koran he was a warlord that spread the faith of islam by the sword and had multiple underage wives"
1) Let us assume the Quran says much about Mohammed being "a warlord that spread the faith of Islam by the sword and had multiple underage wives". So you believe Quran is crap, but THAT you believe?
2) Define pedofile. Define pedofile in Arab world 1400 years ago. Define "underage" - also in Arab world 1400 years ago. Define "barbaric". In Arab world 1400 years ago.
3) Tell me, why do you care about Mohammed at all? Why do you even bother reading the Quran? You think it's crap. Life is too short to read bad books.
WHY THE HECK WOULD ANYONE NON-MUSLIM BOTHER MAKING MOVIES OF MOHAMMED IN THE FIRST PLACE?
You KNOW it's prejudiced crap, you KNOW the people responsible for it are islamophobic idiots, and you take their side! You hate religions more than you love human and civil rights and freedoms! You are just another religious fundamentalist. They use physical violence to express their feelings and opinions, you use sarcasm and other forms of verbal violence, and believe to be better, more civilized person.
Darling, a world where people may not believe ANYTHING they want to, how ever stupid, mislead or false it ever seems to be to someone else, is called Theocracy, and NO; WE DO NOT WANT IT. Even when YOU are convinced of that YOUR religion is the best and enough for the rest of the world, and based on reasoning and sound thinking and what ever you happen to believe is The Truth, and even though the majority of the world holds the same belief... because, don't fool yourself and think your belief is "better" or "more valid" than another, just because you believe in science.
Take a long walk in the nature and pick things, like acorns, horse chestnuts, pinecones, twigs and leaves.
I would like every Pagan Sabbath celebrated as if it was Yule. It is especially difficult to do when it comes to the Autumn holidays, because we in the Western world just don't have the traditions. Sure, there's Harvest feast, Michael's Mass and Thanksgiving, but... In the modern, urbanized world, people barely know where they food comes from, not to mention celebrate the harvest. The USonian thanksgiving is big, but it's celebrated very late in the Autumn and it is very strongly associated with the Christian history of USA. But the truth is that most of the family traditions are just a couple of generations old, if even that. Our parents are responsible of creating the traditions we experience to be The True Holiday, and when we get old and start celebrating the holidays with friends and spouses, we realize that their True Holiday is quite different from ours... It really takes only a couple of years for you to create traditions for your own family (even if it includes just you), so start creating!
Now, there has been people telling me that they don't celebrate this or that - "Mabon" is a Wiccan name for a Norse tradition, so most other forms of Paganity don't celebrate Mabon. To me it's Autumn Equinox, and to me the Sun Days have always been significant... to me there's something magical with the idea of day and night being exactly the same length twice a year, then the one or the other getting longer, until one day it's the day when the night is the longest or the day is the longest... These are to me Goddess ordained holidays. They are put in the movements of the Earth. This is Divine Calender. So I cannot understand people who claim to be Pagan but don't celebrate Autumn Equinox. It doesn't make any sense to me. (That doesn't mean that I would say you're not a Pagan because you don't celebrate Mabon (or what ever name you wish to use of it), because you form your own observations of your faith the way that suits you, and you define your faith yourself. I have nothing to do with that. I'm just saying I don't understand it :-D)
After the long prologue, I wanted to speak about a couple of things. One needs to focus on a couple of things when creating traditions.
1) Honor the Holiday.
Make it different, elevated, from all the other days of the year. That means, you really NEED to clean. (And that reveals that I am a sloppy housewife. I don't like cleaning, I'm more of a hoarder, and I'd rather do creative stuff or reading, than clean. So my home is not very clean and tidy normally. I'm just talking to you as if you were me :-D Now, if you are one of those miraculous people who actually manages to keep their homes immaculate 24/7, I'm not talking to you, when I say "you have to clean". YOU will have to find other ways to differ this day from all the other days of the year.) Decorate the home for the party, HAVE a party, watch season appropriate movies, read season appropriate books, enjoy season appropriate music... think about your favorite feast/holiday and try to remember what makes it so, and season adjust that for Mabon. Take your favorite foods created with the season vegetables and dedicate this specific day for that food. It makes both the day and the dish that much more special :-D
2) Create traditions that suit you, your life, your style, your preferences.
Don't take on too much. Don't take on traditions that just don't feel right to you. One thing I have noticed is that there's tons of "material" in Yule. There are more "traditions" I'd like to have at Yule than I can fit in Yule. So - take those traditions you like but have no room for at Yule and divide them throughout the year for the other Sabbaths. For example, we in Scandinavia have a tradition of "Glögg party". A week or two before Yule, people gather around a kettle of mulled wine, and have a small fore-party. This would be perfect for Mabon. Maybe the weather isn't too suitable for mulled wine, as September can be - and is - warm in many places on this planet, but perhaps wine tasting party?
3) Appeal to all senses
What most people remember of different holidays best is the smell... the specific, different, good smell that lingered in the house all through the holidays. You know exactly what I'm talking about, because you can almost smell it right now. :-D
As there are no general, traditional scent for Mabon, try - wine, mulled wine - fruits, especially apples, pear, plum - woody scents, like sandalwood, patchouli, rosewood, cedar and camphor. - chrysanthemums, asters, marigolds - nuts and seeds, like sesame seed and hazelnut (the scent of nutella... ;-)) - the smell of woods when you walk there in the autumn... everything is wet, and smells extra strong, the mushrooms, the leaves, the soil, the trees... You can recreate this by having a bowl of leaves, mushroom and wood chips kept moist.
The other senses are, of course, hearing, sight, touch, and taste. Taste you appeal to by all the good, special food and candy; sight is pleased with all the colors and shapes and decorations - these two are no problem. What is more problematic is the sounds and feelings...
And feelings?
Pulling on the rubber boots. First time you pull on the sweater after summer. Raindrops on your skin. The feeling of raincoat, oilcloth, the rustling plastic... The feeling of soil through the rubber boots, the slightly springy feeling of layers of moss, needles and moisture... and then you come back home and cuddle in front of the open fireplace, a blanket and a cup of hot chocolate... The feeling of dry leaves. The feeling of fir-cones, nuts, acorns, chestnuts...
Now, don't use wax cloth to decorate your home, because it's a really ordinary, homely, common material, which doesn't honor the holiday, but try using materials like corduroy, tweed, wool, felt and fleece, and leather.
One idea would be to try to recreate a sort of a hunting lodge feeling, with wood with bark on, rough stone, woodland animals and Mid-European folklore :-D (Tyroler look, dirndl, Austria, Germany, Bavaria, October fest and so on.)
